Please Please Me

There is a part in one of my favourite movies, where this guy is trying to get a girl to date him, so he gets this really "cool" guy to help him attract her attention.... well the guy is resisting some of the changes he has to make with the excuse that those things "just aren't him," to which the cool guy replies, " 'YOU' is a very fluid concept right now."


I always thought this was funny before, but today I was driving home from school and realized that I am fluid. In my heart, and with a small hand full of people, I am myself and I know who I am... this isn't the problem... I mean that I act differently depending on who I'm with. (And I don't mean I change my actions or lower my values or anything) Basically I change the way I talk and laugh to suit whoever I'm spending time with....

Allow me to use an example to better illustrate this point:

I have a friend, we'll call "K" who talks SUPER fast and she is high energy and super chatty all the time, and she sorta thrives off of speaking over each other and vying for the leader spot..
I also have a friend, "S" who likes to listen to something, think about it, and reply slowly, and she likes to be listened to the same way. She likes to hear what people have to say, but she likes each person to take their turn.

Recently, both of them failed a practical eval we had at school, and both called to talk to me about it that night. With K, we both spoke over each other and laughed and talked and I convinced her not to worry, and that I would help her practice before her re-eval and that we'd work everything out.

When S called, I mostly listened to her talk, and she really just wanted me to tell her what she needed to do to be successful next time, so I talked slowly, and I listened, and I told her what I knew she wanted to hear.

I think "fluid" is the wrong word for what I am. I am still me, I am just a different version of me depending on who I'm with. I think I am just a pleaser.

Sick Day

Today is a sick day. I started feeling a little off on Sunday morning, but I kept thinking that if I could just get a good sleep I would be better, but not today. Today I am staying home from school until later this afternoon (although I have done some homework from bed today) and staying in bed, and sleeping. So you can imagine my delight when I woke up and went to e-mail my school to say I wouldn't be there, to find an e-mail from one of my favourite people! This woman is one of the sweetest, most fun, "cool" people that I've ever met, and I hope I can be like her when I grow up.
One of the reasons for the e-mail was that I have decided to do it - to cut my hair short. It's really not that big a deal, I've had short hair before, but I've been wanting to do it for forEVER, and certain male suitors were against it, so I didn't... well now I'm doing it ! I can't wait. I feel like having short hair represents having more fun, and being more flirty, and sassy, and those things are me!
I just can't wait. I'll be sure to take before and after pictures!

So as much as I hate missing school and leaving behind responsibilities, Hooray for sick days!!

Four Things

4 shows I watch:
(I am more a movie girl.. but there are shows I have watched in past so I will count those!)
1. Grey's Anatomy (to indulge the little piece of me that will always want to be a surgeon)
2. Gilmore Girls (my mom got me hooked!)
3. Criminal Minds (I LOVE the profiling part of it!)
4. What Not To Wear (What girl wouldn't like this?!)


4 things I am passionate about:
1. My WONDERFUL Family
2. My Schooling
3. Dancing
4. My Values (this one should be at the top of the list)


4 phrases I say a lot:
1. "Here's the thing"
2. "You are the best human"
3. *Laughing* (this totally counts, and I say it A LOT!)
4. "Best thing ever"

4 things I have learned from the past:
1. (I read this comment the other day and though it was very true) "Things change, so don't make plans, make GOALS!"
2. Don't EVER assume you know what a person will be like just by looking at them.
3. Don't rush things, because you'll look back later and wish you had enjoyed them more.. (I'm definitely still working on this one!)
4. Don't ever sacrifice something you believe for the sake of avoiding an awkward situation.

4 places I'd like to go:
1. Venice
2. Great Britain
3. Hawaii; Mexico; just somewhere warm!
4. Australia

4 things I did yesterday:
1. Learned about the digestive system.
2. Spent 2 1/2 hours driving.
3. Stood up for what I believe it, and was recognized for it.
4. Had a shower at night just cause I felt like it.

4 things I am looking forward to:
1. Christmas morning!! (You know that feeling when you wake up and run into the living room and your family is there and everyone is sleepy and in pj's and you just feel more love than you do any other day?)
2. Having a break from school / Finishing my program (in June)
3. Seeing my good friend Nolan again
4. Spending time with my mom

4 things I love about winter:
1. Snow in your hair and having a pink nose. Also mittens.
2. Ice skating.
3. The Nativity Pageant
4. Cozying up with mittens and hot apple cider

4 things on my wish list:
1. Going to Disneyland (check!)
2. A puppy.
3. Spending time with my Mom
4. Hanging out with my siblings, especially Bail.

4 people I tag:
Well I'm not sure who reads this... so I think I'll just pick some people who I really like! Hahaha.
1. Morales Girls!
2. Shelli !
3. Rach Ellis!
4. Kelsey Scott

Gah.

Today was a wonderful day.

I went to school, and learned about teeth, (which I love) and then had a practical evaluation, which I rocked. Then I drove home, and my favourite radio station was great, and BELIEVE IT OR NOT, I even called in and REQUESTED a song, and they played it! HOW COOL IS THAT! (call me weird, but I am very excited by these kinds of things!)


But then I got home, and started looking at facebook a little, and as much as I don't want to admit it, (out loud, or to my own self) I felt a little lonely. I am not supposed to feel lonely... I am only a youngin, and am doing so well with my life! And I should be wild and independent and fun! And I do have those things lots of times, but I also feel a little lonely.

I think I want to move away somewhere and live with 4 FUN girls and run out the the store in the night all dressed up for basically no reason, and watch movies and cry and eat snacks, and have dance parties, and make dinner together, and borrow each others clothes. That would be pretty fun I think.

Birthday List...

It's my 19th birthday on Sunday, and I think I know what I want...

Today I had a big break between classes, and got to go watch my friend get a filling. (There is no sarcasm here, I was genuinely excited about getting to do this) and for some reason her dentist's 8 week old puppy was just sitting on the floor behind the front desk.... and I think I fell in love. He just had the CUTEST little face and he was fun and nice and good and ADORABLE, and I think I really REALLY REALLY just want one. Here are some more reasons why...
1. They are small, and look cute
2. They are cuddly
3. They give you something to play with when you are bored
4. They require you to exercise with them
5. They make you so excited to come home even when school was long and tough and all you want to do is crawl into bed and not talk to anyone or do anything.
6. They always will love you no matter what
7. You can take them to the beach
8. You can be "the girl with the puppy" when you go places
9. They always ALWAYS want to hang out with you
10. They can't be mean
11. They protect you from strangers.
12. They don't care if your room is messy
13. You can name them the kind of people names that you think are kinda cute, but just not quite right for a real human (Bruno, Rufus, Oscar, Sam, Max, Franklin etc.)

Maybe my new found love for a cuddly little thing has something to do with the fact that I recently became single. All I know is that it took a LOT of self-restraint to keep myself from grabbing the dog and booking it out of that dental building this afternoon.
The only problem is that I don't know if I would love it still once it grew big.

Oh well. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

Hoppy Halloowweeeeenn

This post actually has nothing to do with Halloween - good trick huh ?
LIFE. IS. GOOD.
I am so excited to finish school and have a real career that I think I will LOVE, and be grown up, and learn to cook, and have long hair, and wear scrubs everyday, and talk to patients, and not go to school, and go visit my friends.

Overall, it's been a great weekend.

It's that time of year again...

I feel kinda bored with life. I am ready to do something new and exciting ! I want to move somewhere, as much as I DON'T want to ever move away and have to live with strangers and pay rent and buy groceries, I think I just need to sometime. I need to try something I've never tried before - have a little adventure!

I think it's just because it's almost November. This is the hardest part of the year for me because the "Back to School" novelty has worn off, and I don't like Halloween, so really there is just a big gap from the end of October until the beginning of December when you can start to be excited for Christmas. (Of corse there IS my birthday, which I always adds some excitement to my same-old routine for a day or two!) Every year, this time hits, and I feel bored. I need a shopping spree, or a drastically new hair style, or a puppy, or just... something !

Well.. here's to hoping I get a puppy for my birthday.

Life Update

Ooooh yes, we have approached that familiar mark where I have lost the desire to stick with it, and have completely forgotten about my blog, hahaha. (Sort of true, and sort of I just haven't been able to think of anything good enough to write about!)
BUT, the time has finally come! I hope you're as excited as I am!!

Well folks, I'm back in school. Yep, that's right, I Aubrey Fritz am a second year university student. (WAHOO! How good does that sound?!) It's week 4 in my Dental Assisting program... here is a list of what I've learned so far...

1) To floss properly, not just my own, but OTHER HUMANS teeth.

2) To put on a dental dam... I know I know, "that horrible blue piece of balloon that suffocates you and gets spit all over your face" well get over it. It's keeps you from swallowing pieces of teeth during fillings, and from gagging on all the instruments we're putting in your mouth! PLUS I'm way good at it and I promise to give you the saliva ejector before we start!

3) That I am a size M in latex and vinyl gloves, but a S in nitral ones. (Surprised? So was I !)

4) That I was not wrong when I predicted that wearing scrubs everyday would be the best. thing. ever. Seriously, who wouldn't want to wear PAJAMAS to work?!

5) To understand what the dentist means when he starts saying things like, "We have a lingual class 5 composite on the 2-2" or "We'll need an amalgam MOD on the 1-6" (This is probably what I'm most excited for... I just feel so professional with my little dentition chart and clipboard!)

Overall, I would say things are going pretty well. I've learned lots of cool stuff, and survived my first midterm. My relationship with school has been mostly good news so far... let's hope it stays that way !

So, the one, non-Sunday, day that I don't spend in school, I spend at work. Which sucks because not only do I feel totally out of the loop there, but it leaves be no free days. Although this is the same situation I was in last year, it somehow seems worse now. I just have to keep in mind that in June I will have a CAREER that I LOVE and it makes it all worth while !

Other than that, I'd say my life is pretty uneventful ! (surprising with all my free time these days huh?) I promise to keep the posts coming!

Until next time ! Happy flossing =)

Uncle Ben's # 1

This week has been tough for me; it began with (approximately 116 hours ago)a good-bye to my love, followed by 4 days of SCHOOL STREEEEESSS, accompanied by a hectic and oddly unfulfilling work week.
Sidenote: Let me explain that last comment. I love my job. I deal with a TON of people, lots of whom are eligible for senior discounts, and almost every day I go home feeling like I have made a positive impact in the world... okay, maybe that's a but much, but I really do feel fulfilled after my usual work day.
(Okay... this side note wasn't supposed to be this long.. BUT, let me tell one story...) One day a man came into my work, probably about 65 years old, and asked me if we had a photocopier. I replied that of course I did, and how could I help him? He then proceeded to ask me if I could blow up a tiny blurb of text. After taking approximately 3 minutes to do so, the man proceeded to thank me as if I had just saved him from an impending doom, and asked me how much he owed me. I replied that it was "on me, this time only" he laughed, took my hand, and tucked a toonie inside my fingers. That very toonie is still taped inside my locker door, so that when my interactions with patients are less than kind, I can look at that toonie, and be reminded of the genuine kindess of certain people. End of Sidenote

SO... throughout this exceptionally tough week, my Gramma has been absolutely wonderful. Not only has she been helping me out immensely with the monetary demands of furthering my education, but she has been a HUGE help in getting me organized; picking up all the books I'll need this semester, following up with first aid programs, and just all sorts of things!
Today when I arrived home from work, my Gramma greeted me with the statement that I "sure am my Uncle Ben's number 1." -----> Apparantly my Gramma had a chat with said Uncle today, and ended up explaining to him my current life choices, namely furthering my education, making sure I have a part of my schedule left open for working, and just being a good (almost) grown up. To all of this, my Uncle Ben responded, "She sure has a good head on her shoulders doing all of this, doesn't she!" It means a lot to me to make my family proud. I value their opinions more than those of any one else. I have THE BEST family in the whole world, and nothing makes me so happy, as knowing that they are proud of me.
Thanks Uncle Ben.
Thanks Grams.

Glad to be a Girl

Every Sunday I remember how glad I am to be a girl.
Yes, it's true, there are some aspects of being a female that are not so appealing: but for the most part, I am a genuine girlie-girl.
I will admit that there are some weeks that go by when I don't use my hair dryer at all... I am NOT a morning person, and sometimes 7:30am comes far too soon, and I forfeit my "hair-doing time" for a few more blessed minutes in bed....HOWEVER, every Sunday I have the opportunity the get dressed up in my Sunday Best and wake up with loads of time for hair-doing. I absolutely love Sundays. They are by far my favourite day of the week. (For many reasons.. not just the fact that I have more time in the mornings!)
Seriously, is there anything better than putting on a cute little dress, slipping into a pair of heels, and pinning up your hair? No. I completely believe that no girl can feel more pretty, or flirty, or fun than when she is wearing a dress.
Any post with this title could not be complete without a thank you to all the aunts, my mom, and other women in my life who, by example, have taught me how to be a girl; not to say that I magically skipped over age 14 and the first horrible eyebrow plucking experience, but still, I would like to think I made it out alright. So thank you to my Mom who, after much pleading, took me to get my ears pierced on my seventh birthday; thank you to my Aunty Laura, who on my 14th birthday taught me the magic of M.A.C.; thank you to my Aunty Rachel who gave me my first layered hair cut, and thank you to everyone who miraculously still loves me even after putting up with me during the years from age 12 to 15.
I feel for every girl with little bits of toilet paper stuck all over her ankles because she just shaved her legs for the first time, for every girl who passes WAAAYYY over the black eyeliner limit upon her introduction to it, for every girl who goes through the "hoodies at church is cool" phase - I promise, you WILL get through this!

I suppose this post should really have waited until I am out of my teenage years; with just over a year to go, I can not yet say that I've lived through every teenage experience. I can only hope that I will be able to survive young adulthood as well- hopefully with a little more poise this time!

-One Year-

You know how people are always talking about how you should make a note of where you will be in 5 or 10 years and seal it away and not look at it until that time has passed? Well I would like to make a note about ONE YEAR from today.... sort of....

I was recently contacted by school here in Victoria, and informed that a seat has become available in the Dental Assisting Program! (True, Dental Hygiene is my ultimate goal, but Assisting is the plan until I get a spot in a hygiene program!) And so... one year from today, I am OVERJOYED to say that I will be wearing SCRUBS.
Sidenote: Maybe it's just me, but I ADORE the idea of wearing scrubs. I think they are soo adorable, and comfy, and maybe my love for hospital shows also has something to do with it, but I just LOVE them!!! I can't wait to stop by the grocery store wearing them, or to meet up with a friend after work wearing them. OH I just can't WAIT !

One year from today I expect to still be living where I am now. I love my house, and my room, and my home ward, and just everything I have here. I love being close to my cousins.
Sidenote: I have lived in quite a few different places, and have therefore attended quite a few different wards, and although there are people everything who are genuine, kind, wonderful people, there's just something about one's home ward that can not be recreated anywhere. It made me so sad to live in a place where other people had grown up, and everyone ELSE had known each other for years, when we had to be the new family - having the knowledge that a day's drive away, was a ward where OUR family would be the one who knew everyone made the situation even worse. One of my favourite things about living here, is that I can count on the fact that every Sunday, I will see almost all of the people who have watched me grow up. Getting a hand shake from Brother Hinks at the door, and a hug from Brother Welton absolutely warms my heart. Brother McCallum always grabs my hand when we meet in the hall, and I can't help but think that this was the man who would ease my pain of being dropped off in nursery so many years ago, and who often held me when I was a baby. I absolutely love these people. I feel sort of like the neighborhood sweetheart knowing that all of these people have watched me grow up.
I suppose that in one year I will be a Relief Society regular. I will admit, I did NOT want to be one of those girls who missed Young Women's.... BUT I DO !!! A small piece of my heart will always be with those girls. I just want the best for them ! I wish I could get inside their heads and convince them that high school isn't a big deal, and that friends aren't worth going against what you KNOW is right ! I wish I could tell them that I LOVE them, and to smarten up!! I LOOOOVVVEEE the leaders that I had when I was a Laurel. I feel almost like I cheated because I had such WONDERFUL relationships with my advisers, and had such similar ideas as they did! I feel like I could talk about anything and everything with them, and I trust that they would be able to give me the best advice. If ever I need a stand-in Mom when mine is not available, I KNOW I have one with any of these wonderful women.

I hope that in one year my cousin will wear my grad dress. I don't think she will, and I don't blame her - even if there is a dress available, it's a special thing to have your own dress, that YOU picked out. BUT, my dress was absolutely gorgeous, and would look GREAT on her. I also hope that she will ask me to do her hair. I don't want to boast, but I'm good at it, and it would really be a fun experience I think. I love her so much, and I hope I am a good example for her.

In one year I hope that I am more fit. I hope that my cutting out a lot of junk food and improving my diet, and by spending more time working on my fitness, that I will be in better shape than I am today.

In one year I hope that I am better than I am today. I hope that I know my scriptures better, and that I have learned a lot. I hope that I am a better teacher, and a better listener. I hope that I am a better example, and a more loving big sister. I hope that my Mom is even more my best friend, and that my Gramma is proud of who I am.

One year is 12 months, 52 weeks, 365 days. One year is so many struggles, and challenges, and experiences. I am going to do my best to live each day to it's fullest, and to build a better me.
CHEERS to one year today !!!

Stephanie Nielson

I recently discovered Stephanie Nielson, who, for those of you who don't know, is a 20-something year old woman who, about two years ago, was in a horrible plane crash with her husband and a pilot friend of theirs. Her friend was not able to recover from his injuries, and Stephanie suffered severe burns to 83% of her body.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHDvxPjsm8E

As I watched this beautiful video created by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, I was overcome with guilt for the lack of appreciation I have for my blessings here in mortality; Stephanie's story helped me to truly see how INCREDIBLY blessed I am! I realized how completely for granted I take my blessing of having a working, normal, completely able, physical body.

I was so touched by her story, that I found Stephanie's blog online, and read some of the posts from both before, and after the accident. I was struck by the unbelievable love and support of her husband (whom she calls "Mr. Nielson"- how cute is that?!); despite the deformity of her body and face, one can see by the way he looks at his wife, that "Mr. Nielson" has a completely unconditional love for her.

This love causes me to reflect on the love of our Saviour, who cared so deeply for each of us, that he gave his life at Gethsemane so that we will EACH have the opportunity, if we choose to take it, to return to live with our Father in Heaven again. No matter how badly stained by the world we become, no matter how scarred and scraped and burned, our Heavenly Father's love for us will never cease to be. I am overcome with gratitude when I think of the amazing sacrifice that He made for us, and am persuaded to do my very best to make sure this sacrifice was not in vain.

I am thankful for this opportunity to experience mortality, and to serve my role in this probationary period. I will strive each day to prove myself, a worthy, righteous disciple of Christ. Like Stephanie, I will do my best to find the value in each day, not taking for granted any of life's sweet experiences.

Stephanie,

Know that you have been such a strength to me, and have inspired me to better myself each day, and to do all I can to strengthen my relationship with my Heavenly Father. Thank you so much for your perseverance, and courage.

Sincerely,
A grateful reader.

Changes

I have decided to make a change. I can't think of a time when things suddenly weren't how they were before, but I have realized that lately I am impatient and grumpy a lot of the time, and I don't like it one bit. I have decided that to change this, I will spend less time reading make believe stories, and more time reading my scriptures, less time listening to the radio, and more time in reflection, less time sleeping in (on my days off!) and more time serving those around me. I am a firm believer that we are to be in the world, but not of it, and I have found that collectively, as PEOPLE we are so quick toto blame our lack of GOODNESS on a lack of time due to our busy schedules,(little do we know, the wordly things with which we make ourselves so busy will inevitably be of no worth at all to us!) but I know that this is excuse is insufficient. Every person, EVERY person (a bold statement I know, but something that I truly believe!!) has time to read their scriptures daily. EVERY person has time to be kind, and gentle, and good.

Frances de Sales said, "Nothing is so strong as gentleness, (and) nothing is so gentle as real stregth." I completely agree. When I think of the moments in my life that have had the greatest impact, the memories that have stayed with me throughout all of my life, took place in moments of gentle calmness. I hope that as strive to be a better myself, I will be able to grow closer to my Heavenly Father, and become a stronger deciple of Christ.

An aunt, five cousins, a mom, and three siblings later...

My Gramma and I have been lucky enough to enjoy a visit from family these past few weeks... regretably I've had to work most of the time they've been here, but my days off have been a (rare) wonderful treat.


I'll admit, I'm not the first to jump at the opportunity to lend my time to 8 children under the age of 13, HOWEVER, I LOVE these kids. My cousins are wonderful, despite the freezing cold showers on Sunday mornings, arguments in pitches only poodles can hear, horrific noise at UGLY hours of the morning, and completely unpredictable throw-up episodes in the van, these past few weeks have been great. It's not very often that we have the opportunity to get together in such big groups (yes, I know, surprising considering the size of my family) - to better illustrate these events, I would ask that one imagines the movie 'My Big Fat Greek Wedding' - a mayhem of bodies, laughing, talking, hugging, crying, and CHILDREN. I could never understand why the potential husbands and wives were always so intimidated at family gatherings; having gotten older, and more able to stand back and observe the chaos of my clan, I can more easily understand.

There are some things I won't miss - having my room back to myself, warm showers, everything being left in the spot where it belongs - BUT I will miss 8 little "Good morning Aubie"'s every day, and the priceless comments that only kids can get away with (like Jacob during the prelude music in Sacrament Meeting this morning - he leaned over to me and asked "Aubie, WHAT is this TINY song for?!"), and having someone who wants to play with you all the time, who thinks you're the best even when you're wearing pajamas and have morning breath.

All things considered, I think a visit from the family is worth two weeks of cold showers.

Wedding Things

I love my wedding. True, I have not had my wedding, but I love thinking about it, and imagining what it will be like, and planning how everything will be, and looking at photos of other weddings. I love thinking about what my Dad's speech will be like, and having a dance with my Grampa to the song that inspired my name,(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqXek853SDE) and what my Mom will wear, and what the invitations will look like, and most of all... the dress.
I might look forward to this dress more than most... but I think almost every teenage girl has looked for a picture of her PERFECT wedding dress. I understand (and have been warned) that picking out EVERY DETAIL of the dress will only bring disappointment, so I have refrained from setting my heart on anything too specific, but how can you not fall in love with this dress??

http://www.foxglovegowns.com/images/full%20sized/F4A%20custom%20Alencon%20lace%20wedding%20gown%20x600.jpg
(Here's another view)
http://www.foxglovegowns.com/images/full%20sized/D5B%20buttons%20+%20loops%20%20Alencon%20lace%20wedding%20gown%20x450.jpg

Of course, my dress will be more modest, but I just ADORE these lacy gowns!

When we had the privelage of going through the temple open house, I fell in love with the Bridal Room.. it was absolutely beautiful. I can't WAIT to be there with my Mom and get ready to be married for time and all eternity.

The invitations will be beautiful, simple, but beautiful. And WHITE. I love white, especially since it's not a color that I wear very often, so I think it will be even more special on my wedding day.
Keep checking your mailboxes! Invitations to come! (wink)

Aubrey and the NO GOOD, VERY BAD day

Yesterday was a no good, very bad day.
It began to the sound of my alarm clock at 7am (a disgusting hour for me) reminding me that I had a dentist appointment at 8 o'clock that morning. I got ready, and went to get my filling. This may seem strange, but I quite like going to the dentist... .probably a good thing since I plan to spend a lot of time there once I become a hygienist. Then (since my dentist is right next to where I work) I stopped by work to get a few things ordered for patients, and had the unfortunate luck of (after being "on hold" for about ten minutes), having my call answered by the grumpiest woman of all time. After making me feel a complete fool, she reluctantly ordered what I needed, and ended the phone call. I then was told my one of my colleagues,I would have to tell a patient, that their broken glasses would not be covered under warranty, and that they would have to pay for the repairs (being the bearer of bad news is never a pleasant thing for me).

A NO GOOD, VERY BAD start...

When I finally arrived back home, I decided to go back to bed and try to start my day over, but was greeted by my frantic Gramma, tearing apart the house, preparing for the visit of 8 of her grandchildren.
It was shortly after my room was cleaned and laundry done, that an event threatening to turn my day around occurred! My wonderful best friend showed up unexpectedly at my house! - however; we spent little time together before he spared my Gramma another stressful chore, and went outside to mow the lawn.

Two hours later, having previously not been able to eat with my frozen mouth, I was starving! I thought maybe a nice lunch would make me feel better, but no. Richard then informed me that he had to bring his truck home for his Dad to take camping - this made me even more upset as it reminded me that he would be gone for the next four days. So, after acting horribly to everyone around me, Richard had to leave, and I was left feeling angry, and wishing I would have apologized.

After I reluctantly accompanied my Gramma grocery shopping, Richard called to say he was all packed, and on his way over.(Horray!!!) We went to grab a bite to eat, and prepared to make our way over to a YSA activity. I guess he could tell I wasn't in the mood to be cheerful and outgoing, so after a completely illegal u-turn, to my surprise we started heading the opposite direction! We ended up at the pool, and have a TON of fun. (I forgot how much I liked water slides !)It seemed like my no good, very bad day had finally turned around! But in true, NO GOOD, VERY BAD day fashion, I realized I had lost my green scarf. We retraced our steps around town, but with no luck, made our way back to my house, scarfless. Somehow, even after all the horrible events of the day, I went to bed feeling like the luckiest girl in the world. I have a WONDERFUL family, a beautiful home, a great job, and the best friend a girl could ever ask for.
I think from now on, I'll leave the NO GOOD, VERY BAD days to Alexander.

The Ambulance in the Valley

I'd heard this story before, but when it was brought up the other day, I just had to look up the poem.... I love it! I'm the kind of person who thinks that idealy, we should be prepared for the worst, but do our best to AVOID getting into the worst situations.
I just love this poem !!

"‘Twas a dangerous cliff, as they freely confessed,
Though to walk near its crest was so pleasant,
But over its terrible edge there had slipped,
A duke and full many a peasant.

So the people said something would have to be done,
But their projects did not at all tally.
Some said, "Put a fence around the edge of the cliff,"
Some, "An ambulance down in the valley."

But the cry for the ambulance carried the day,
For it spread through the neighboring city,
A fence may be useful or not, it is true,
But each heart became moved with pity,

For those who slipped over that dangerous cliff;
And the dwellers on highway and alley
Gave pounds and gave pence not to put up a fence,
But an ambulance down in the valley.

Then an old sage remarked, "it’s a marvel to me
That people give far more attention
To repairing the results than to stopping the cause,
When they’d much better aim at prevention.

"Let us stop at its source all this hurt," cried he.
"Come, neighbors and friends, let us rally.
If the cliff we will fence, we might almost dispense
With the ambulance down in the valley."

Dilemma of a Life Time

I think I've been subconsciously putting of writing this post for a while, mainly becaues (as horrible as this is) I don't even want to give this person the satisfaction of writing about her... but none the less... here it is.
I had a friend a long time ago, a very good friend, who was... to be honest I don't know how to describe it. She was kinda like an older sister, but also just a friend. She was a little older, and SO MUCH FUN. I think it was my friendship with her that made me more okay with acting silly in front of people, and not minding what they thought! It was through her that I got to know others of my closest friends (which in the end would really annoy her!) And then the fighting began.
Let me admit.. I had been warned about what she was "really like" before, but from all our time spent together I would never have guessed this secret mean side of her existed! And then. slowly but surely, I began to see this side that everyone has told me about. I can't say exactly when it started, but she returned home for multiple visits, and it began then.. it was just CONSTANT snide remarks and put downs whenever I would say or do anything. At first I thought I was just being sensitive, I do know after all that I am easily embarrassed and upset. But when even the witnesses began to notice, I knew it wasn't just me. It got so bad that I would leave her company crying every time we were together.
AND THEN, what I never expected even after her poor behavior... when tragedy struck, she turned on me completely. She called me HORRIBLE things, and behind my back insulted my entire personality, and worst, my family. I tried to contact her, and she hid from me, so I left an incredibly hurt message on her phone, and removed her from my internet "friends" list. Since that time she has written multiple blogs and messages about how much she dislikes me, and has even gone as far as to say that she wishes she had never known me. There was a time when I would have expected more of her as a friend, but even my expectations of her as a PERSON were dashed long ago.

She has since apologized, and I really don't feel angry at her for the horrible things she said, but never in my life have I been treated by ANYONE the way I've been treated by her. I can say that I have no hard feelings toward her, but I know that I have not completely, honestly forgiven her. My thoughts are as follows... I KNOW I should whole-heartedly forgive her, but I also know that I do NOT need to put myself in a position to be hurt again. (There was a time when our friendship was seemingly patched up, but after only a few weeks she had again torn it apart!) I can not now, and I don't think ever TRULY trust her again.

I don't know what to do. There will be an opportunity to change things in a few weeks, and I know that those close to her (one of whom is also very close to me) would like things to be fixed, but what do I do? I can't act like nothing ever happened, but I also REALLY don't want a big crying forgiveness speech, we did that in the past and it only made it hurt more when she completely forgot it.

And just to add to the dilemma, I think she is about to make a HUGE mistake. She is rushing into something that I KNOW she should stop, and wait... just for a little while before she does!

What should I do? How should I fix things? Do we have to be friends after we fix things? Can two best friends truly just grow apart to the point where they can't be friends anymore? HELP!

Sweet Dreams

There are days when, although I try not to, I can't help but dwell on thoughts of my life in the future. It makes me completely giddy to think of when I am first married and have not a cent to my name, when we walk everywhere we can because we can hardly afford to run our little car, and we live in a tiny little basement suite or apartment somewhere. I hope that even though our material possessions will be few, that my wonderful Prince Charming and I will be able to make our little house feel like home, and be overjoyed to sit on the floor when friends come over, because our little kitchen table won't be big enough for guests. The idea of coming home after work to spend the evening with my sweet heart fills my heart with joy and excitement ! I can't WAIT for the day when there are no more "Goodnight"s but Eternal "Good Morning"s. I can just picture us sitting on our first furniture, eating dinner at our tiny kitchen table, watching our favourite movies on our tiny little television. I just can't wait for the day !!
And then the time will come when little ones will join us, maybe on a slightly larger couch, or in a slightly newer car, and together we will continue on life's journey no longer as a couple, but our own little family - going to visit Gramma and Grampa, riding the swings at the park, sitting in a high chair in the kitchen, my husband and I being able to sniff that WONDERFUL baby smell anytime we want to !
I know it will be tough, and that scrimping by won't always be cute and wonderful, but I just can't WAIT for the next part of my life to begin !
I just can't WAIT for Good Morning !

Snow, Snow, GO AWAY !

This morning I woke to the MOST unpleasant surprise. It pretended to be timid as I pulled out of the garage, melting when it hit the ground, not doing anyone any harm.

Nice prank Snow.

About 5 minutes from my house it started getting bad, but it was okay, I would get to the highway and everything would be fine. Again, Snow tricked me. It wasn't until I saw a little car similar to mine turning around after having slid across the road, that I decided to turn around. And today of all days, when I have my LAST mid term. Now I'm going to spend all weekend in anticipation of the re-write.

You've won this time Snow, but I'm coming back stronger than ever ! Enjoy your victory while it lasts !

First Time Blogger !

So I've never blogged before (and I`m kind of nervous!), but I find it tough to keep a journal, and I'm thinking that this will be a good way for me to keep track of the best things in life ! (Not to mention that the example of a WONDERFUL Young Women's leader may have had an effect on me.)
So read if you're interested and I'll do my best to keep the updates coming !
-Aubrey